Linx

I wanna be a rapper now. Check this out. (Being the responsible parent I am, I must warn you... there are explicit lyrics on here.)

This is why I’m glad I quit drinking. At least I THOUGHT I was a good dancer.

Sucks to be Zab Judah this night.

I can’t wait for this one.

And yes, I do have too much time on my hands.

P.S. I would like to thank "The Sports Guy" Bill Simmons for showing me the way... to awesome clips!

Thinking Out Loud

062906
1324 Hours

Last night’s loss has me feeling violated. It was just a dirty beating. I felt like a hooker who was holding out on her pimp and he knew it… AND he got his money anyway! Stupid softball!

Yeah, but anyway… it’s been a solid 2 months since I’ve been retired and I’m still loving every minute of it. I shouldn’t be, but I am. I think this is the most time I’ve spent at home ever. Before it was school and work every day, from 6AM to bedtime, now that drinking is no longer a problem, I feel more at peace with the world and have learned to appreciate… nothing! You thought I was going to go all soft and sensitive! Ha! Just because I have 3 daughters doesn’t mean I’m that way. But I’m trying. NO I’M NOT! But I do enjoy being at home every day with my family. I can’t say the same for them though. I think they’re all sick of me by now. TOUGH!

“Superman Returns” came out yesterday and it looks quite good. But 2 ½ hours seems a bit long for me. If I remember correctly, the long running-time didn’t help “King Kong” that much. I thought that was a pretty good movie, it was just a bit too long. But what the hell do I know about movies. I only picked 4 out of 5 of the Oscar winners in March. Then again, I thought “Narnia” was going to bomb. So who knows?

As of today, no one has yet accepted my offer to visit the ranch to tell me why I should vote for them. Not one candidate. One thing I did forget was to extend that challenge to the RL District candidates. Why bother? I’m only a single voice. My vote won’t matter. If that’s the case, I’ll just go on more of my rants with no really solid data on what I say. I’m not trying to be Bill Lawrence of the blogworld, I’m just saying what needs to be said… sometimes. Honestly, I’m a little worried about this batch of candidates. This is the future of our nation? Well, it’s only until 2010. 2010?!?!?! That seems so far away!

Staying on the topic of elections, is it me, or doesn’t it seem like all council members would support each other? They have to work with each other quite a bit. So you would think that it would be awkward that some council members have signs that support the challenger in the Treasurer race. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe it’s not just me. Who knows?

What do you think of the new/old song? In my older years, I have come to appreciate the awesomeness of Metallica. Rock and roll!

The Rant: Volume II

062806
2201 Hours

First of all, let me start out by thanking Chris J. for defining what he does. And I’m sooooo sorry for calling your deal a pyramid. I was just using the term Judy Roy used a few years back. Sorry, bro. But technically, if you’re in sales, you can make more than your director, manager, supervisor and stuff by commission, baby!

Back to the jobs rant, there aren’t enough around here. We need a big-ass factory to get jobs out to the people, a factory that makes furniture perhaps. Everybody needs furniture. Or shoes. What about like Anderson Fabrics? Now I’m not too sure what the hell they make, but last time I looked it up, fabric makes clothes, and everybody needs clothes at a decent price. We need everyday items that we can all afford without going all the way to Bemidji every payday. With the store we have, those prices are ridiculous. They should have prices that can fit into the budget of a family of 4 or 5 (or even more) who has to struggle payday to payday if they are one of the fortunate 800-1,000 members who have a job. A lot of Red Lake homes are single-parent families who can barely afford Red Lake Food prices. The store should be a place for us to go to without worrying about the high prices. It’s for us, so why aren’t the prices for us? AND GAS?!?!?! Get the f*** outta here with those prices! Ridiculous.

… and breathe…

Again, I have no idea where that came from. Now I need a loan to build a factory to make some clothes for my peeps.

Who’s up for a new song?

Cedric the Dog

My newest animal.

The Rant: Continued

062706
1136 Hours

Okay, where was I, something about my generation (Talkin’ bout my geeeeeeneration!) Oh yeah, maybe it’s the sting of my first and only political loss, but it looks to me that we will, as Natives of this fine land, always be stuck in a rut. Change is what I hear being asked for, yet none is being done. Being out of work for the past 2 months (by choice) has shown me what it’s like out there for the unemployed. There aren’t many opportunities around Red Lake. All of the jobs are taken. Simple math will show us that. I figure, now this is just a rough (and I mean gravel rough) estimate. The last time I heard, there were about 5,000 or so members living on the reservation. We have 2 casinos within a 55 mile radius, so that’s about 300 jobs. Other programs in Red Lake, that’s about another, hmmm… 300-500 jobs (if we’re lucky.) So we’re looking at around 800 members with jobs in Red Lake… give or take a few hundred. Now remember, this is all off the top of my head. I don’t know the exact number of people employed in Red Lake. But a few years ago, I did a 10-page paper on the Red Lake economy at BSU (and I stayed at a Holiday Inn once) so I know what I’m talking about… a little bit. That leaves me to ask, “What is everybody else supposed to do?” We have around just fewer than 4,000 people that don’t have jobs. How are they supposed to feed their families? What is being done? Shouldn’t drastic measures be taken to ensure the welfare of our people? We have some handy people around here that are resourceful. They can build houses, make clothes, and use their creativity to come up with ideas for other ventures. Lack of faith from those that control the works is what keeps us from doing this. Then again, maybe that lack of faith is because of the way we live. It’s all an endless cycle I suppose. People don’t have jobs so they find ways to stay occupied, picking up bad habits. Then when they get hired, the bad habits will always be there, keeping the success rate low, thus beginning the lack of faith in workers.

Wait! What the hell did I just say?! I have no idea where that came from! This was supposed to be about my generation (Talkin’ bout my geeeeeeneration!)

This is all from experience, baby! My 401k lasted for a few weeks, I liquidated some assets… you know, business stuff. But while waiting for the word on a few jobs, I’ve pondered business ventures. Not the pyramid stuff I’ve been offered when I said I wanted to work from home (thanks for the offer, Chris J.) My grass was pretty long and turned into hay so maybe I could sell hay. Anybody know of anyone wanting to buy some hay? Anyone? Maybe I could do an underground card room like in “Boiler Room.” Or maybe I could run moonshine and have my nephews take it around the county like Uncle Jesse had Bo and Luke doing for him in Hazzard County in the 70s. Would “runnin’ shine” and bootlegging be considered the same thing? Maybe I could bootleg and capitalize off of the addictions of my people after hours. There’s nothing wrong with that, is there? At least it’s not crack/coke/meth. Oh, there is? Well, why did… never mind.

Good lord, I would’ve been an awesome representative.

Why Victor?!

062706
1224 Hours

Entering my 9th week as a retired 30-year-old man, many new revelations have come to me by way of television. One is that THE Victor Newman is becoming an old man! Sad but true. Another, while we’re on the topic of Y&R, is that they all dress so glamorous, sip wine in the afternoon, design fancy items, have big city problems… IN WISCONSIN!!! Isn’t that where Genoa City is? The last time I was in Wisconsin there was nothing but cheese signs everywhere and those hell-bound, no-good for nothing Packers (BOO!!! Retire already, Favre!!!)

Being from the generation that grew up on “The Smurfs” and “The A-Team,” and made Nirvana, 2Pac, and B.I.G. what they are today, one has to wonder what’s next for the new generation of leaders. I have to wonder that because it looks like we are being overlooked. WTF?!

This just in… nephews are coming over! The nephews are coming! The nephews are coming! That will be all for now, I will continue with this rant later on.

The 366th

062506
0639 Hours

ARE YOU READY?!?!?! I’m not. That was just the Fort Minor in the background to get me fired up for the day. But anyway, after being awaken by my dogs (no, I don’t mean my friends or “homeboys”) who were escorting a drunk off the property that wondered in from the woods, it occurred to me that while I’ve been asleep, others are out celebrating the anniversary of my first year without a drink. ONE FULL YEAR WITHOUT A SIP OF ALCOHOL! Holy schnikeys! I never thought it would get this far, really. Seconds turned into minutes, minutes to hours, hours to days, days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months and months turned into a year. And here I am, one year later. Who needs a drink?!

With the whole year thing out of the way, I need something else to dominate. Softball is going well for once. Right now, after 5 weeks, we stand at 3-2. That’s right! We’re over .500. Last season at this time we were 0-5. I’ve only given up one homerun SO FAR. I expect that to multiply by 10 when we play Little Rock though. So I think that world is under control.

What else is there for me? Now that it’s been 56 days of sweet retirement, I believe it’s time to get back out there and get a job. I hate to, but I can’t live like this forever. 3 interviews down, 1 more application to turn in, and I think I’m ‘ret to go!

After minutes of research on how to make a movie, it has shown me that I’ll need about $15,000 to make my own. And that’s just a small independent one! Since my script is about 8% done (yeah, I said 8 %!), it shouldn’t be long before I’m looking to get the equipment. Anybody want to be in a movie? I know how the soundtrack is going to go: a little Johnny Cash… and that’s pretty much all I have for now. Oh yeah, a little Red Lake Hip-Hop-anonymous would do if they want to donate some “tracks.” That’s what we call songs in the entertainment bizz. I think.

After a few days of the “Jonny R. Election Challenge,” nobody has stepped forward to accept. I just want to know why I should vote for you. I’m not going to humiliate you, for crying out loud. It’s just that I always here this door-to-door business and nobody has done that at my ranch since the 2002 election season. And that was just the one time. I STILL don’t know who I’m going to vote for.

As for now, I’ve got only 5 days to finish up my script because my free trial of Microsoft Office runs out on the 30th. Yeah, I’m a cheap old man, so what?

Ohhhh, You Betcha!

062306
1048 Hours

Another interview is in the books. I think I nailed that one like a cheap… uh, nail, too. These are the kinds of jobs I’ve always wanted, the kind where I feel like I’m doing something with my life. And if those don’t work out, I am still waiting for offers to start flowing in to be a writer at some magazine or website like “The Sports Guy” or the “Pop Candy” lady does. SOMETHING!!! ANYTHING!!!

But last night I had a mission to raise some money to get to Minneapolis tonight for the weekend. Why you ask? Because the Cubs are in town! Yes, the Chicago Cubs! Though my first shot a winning, the 7 Clans Casino-Red Lake, like Dirk Nowitzki, went down in flames in crunch time. So I have a few hours to come up with a few hundred. Hmmm… I wonder. I’ll think of something… I’m a survivor.

Wednesday night we had a game and came away with an extra-innings win, 15-14. And for the first time in a while, I came through in crunch time by driving in the tying run. I was going for the walk-off homerun, but that will suffice for now I guess. It was a good old-fashioned slug fest. They were up by seven, then we came back to lead by four, they came back to take the lead in the top of the seventh, we tied it back up in the bottom of the seventh, mowed ‘em down in the eighth, and put them to sleep in the bottom of the eighth. Good times.

As for the rest of the day, my girls are pretty fired up for some extra softball practice. So the scheming for Cubs tickets and travel money will have to hold off for a while. But don’t get me wrong; I AM GOING TO AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE GAMES! You betchyour balls I am! Because I am now a crunch time player, baby!!!

Oda Hell!

062206
2158 Hours

As I close in on one full year of sobriety, it has occurred to me that I might be cured! Are alcoholics always considered “recovering?” Or is there a point where we are considered “recovered?” I need a call on this. Anyone?

9 million walleye my a$$!

Though I doubt there are that many chemically enhanced fish out on our lake, I have had more than my fair share of walleye dinners, with only one being from my catches. I laugh in the face of neurotoxins! Hee-hee!

I was going to go cut the grass at the RL softball fields the other day out of the generosity of my fat heart, but it seems that job has been already contracted out to a lawn mowing firm. As of this evening, it still hasn’t been done. Maybe they’re waiting until the weeds turn green because the sprinklers were on tonight. Up next: the Little Rock field. Give a bro some paint and I’ll have that sum b**** lookin’ like a hundred bucks!

Well, I still haven’t had any candidates show up for a visit, even though it’s only the second day of the “Jonny R. Election Challenge.” If the candidates want to set up a meeting, e-mail me at lydelljroberts06@hotmail.com. If you dare… muhahahahahaha! Just kidding.

Another interview tomorrow! I have to get at least one of these jobs. And to show those employers that I’m not as lazy a slacker as I appear to be, I have eliminated the midday naps. Instead, I’m starting to sleep in until noon. So suck on that!

I Challenge Thee!

062106
1531 Hours

I don’t know what that previous post was about. I’m going to pull an “Uncle Leo” here and go with “I’m old… I’m confused!”

But anyway… election time is creeping up on us. July something rather is right around the corner. So today, I am inviting—no, challenging-- all candidates to stop by my home so I can ask them questions; one on one, just a good old-fashioned talk; man-to-candidate, have them tell me why I should vote for them. Convince me, damn it! Of course, I’ll share what we talk about in the people’s blog. So remember it, write it down, take a picture, I don’t give a f***! My challenge was made 062106, 1539 hours, Little Rock Standard Time. I’m awaiting your visit, Floyd “Buck” Jourdain, Judy Roy, “Jody” Beaulieu, Don Cook, Sr., William Greene, and Harlan Beaulieu. Ah hell, even Toady and Jambi and Clifford Hardy and Gary Nelson can stop by too. Might as well get everybody involved. Refreshments will be served if you bring some and will not sway me to vote for you.

So there it is. Who will accept? Anyone?

Who will you vote for? Leave a comment. You may remain anonymous if you like.

Ozzie Speaks

062106
1504 Hours

Is there no more speaking one’s mind without repercussions? Ozzie Hatin' What is this world coming to when a Venezuelan manager of a world champion of a professional sports team in the US can’t share his displeasure of a writer by calling him a homosexual slur? He obviously isn’t a homophobe. He has gay friends, attends WNBA games (?!?!?!), went to a Madonna concert and plans on going to the “Gay Games” in Chicago (there’s a thing called the “Gay Games?”)


Sorry Ozzie, you’re busted. In these PC times, you have to watch what you say. This is another example of the importance of education. I don’t know how you would address this issue. You’re questioning his courage so you call him a homosexual slur? I… no comment. See, that’s not hard to do. No comment. In the words of Brad Hamilton: Learn it. Know it. Live it.

Other thoughts on this topic: Did you see “The Sopranos” this season? I don’t know about you, but seeing Vito get his gay on and getting it on with his fireman left me a little uneasy so I covered my eyes. Does that make me a homophobe? Am I supposed to be talking about this? It’s all your fault Ozzie Guillen!

Thou Art Back

I pity the fools who dare read this! What would this world be had not Mr. T. graced us with his awesomeness? Undisciplined I tell ya.

Now that the construction on my ranch is complete, I can now go back to L-I-V-I-N. I can go back to my usual retired lifestyle with surfin' the net, watching TV, gaining weight, wishing I had past glories in my high school days to reflect upon and midday naps. Once again, I would recommend them for all. But I don't call them naps, I call it "recharging." That way it sounds like you actually did something to recharge from. And a lot cooler.

But anyway, interview numero two, uh... oh, came and went by on Monday and went quite well I'm hoping. And no, I didn't mention my ability to be awesome 24/7 this time around because I didn't freeze as much as I did during my last interview. Speaking of which, I didn't get the Prevention Specialist job. Which was good, because as a parent and being alcohol-free for 362 days, what the hell do I know about keeping kids busy and away from drugs and alcohol? No, that wasn't a shot. Or was it?

I don't know, bro... but I do know how awesome it is to be an uncle! You can say whatever you want to kids and they have to listen to you. You can be the disciplinarian to somebody else's kids if you see that they aren't acting right. Yeah, I'm strict and tough with my kids, why should I be any different to other kids? And that's what I'm here for. The "Master Uncle" Joe Roberts taught me well. He was the Obi to my Anakin... or the Yoda to my Luke... or, uh... either way, he taught me well.

Another thing that has me pretty excited? Getting old. I know that sounds crazy, but old people can say anything and it sounds smart. Really, go ask an old person something and they can end up telling you how they tied their shoes last week and it sounds like they're passing on the secret to everlasting life or undeciphered wisdom. I think about these things because I'm 30 and not getting any younger. So maybe, just maybe, I shall be full of wisdom someday. And how come everybody my age is getting gray hair and I'm not? Was I supposed to sign up for that somewhere? I demand an answer!

One more thing... GET TO WORK!!! Word around the campfire is that some tribal programs are losing their internet access. So I shall share an office secret with you: Open up Microsoft Word or Excel in another window, keep your internet in the other and when you sense a disturbance in the "Slacker Force" (don't worry, not everybody has it), jump to said Word or Excel like you were busy with an important company document. I liked to jump to Excel because it looks more important. Or you can just GET TO WORK!!!

Welcome, Gossipers!

061606
1054 Hours

What a glorious morning! The air is thick with humidity, the sky is a murky gray color, leaving it uncomfortable for an afternoon nap, and the stories of blogs are running rampant with others’ take on another’s words. Well, mine anyway.

It seems “The Van DOWN BY THE RIVER!” is getting out to the gossip crowd (How are you? It’s good to have you chicky-checkin’ us out!) The new song is dedicated to each and every one of you… because it seems that I am indeed making you crazy with gossip by way of my take on life, thus words being added into my very own (somehow)… creating even more hilarious stories about my own life. Man, you crazy! So quit being adder-onners (my new word for the month of June) and just enjoy what life throws at me. We are “Kool and the Gang” and I hope you all are as well.

But anyway, if drunk dialers want to turn into drunk door-knockers, feel free, I have a “Bombat” at the front door… and by law, as it states in penal code 123.456, section A. paragraph b., of the Constitution, it clearly does state, and I quote “… if an intoxicated individual is on the doorstep of Jon, and he disagrees with his reason for knocking at an ungodly hour of the night, he, by law, has the right to use his “Bombat” to get his message across.” Or something like that.

With that being said, I leave you in the grace and favor of the Lord.

Can you dig it, suckaaaaaaaaah!!! (Does Booker T. still say that? If not, disregard. Is he still called Booker T.?)

Update 061506

061506
1233 Hours

After a crushing defeat last night at the hands of Ponemah by the score of 9-7, one has to reflect on what life is all about. How could this world known as competitive softball be so cruel? Okay, maybe it’s not that hurtful of a loss, but still; a loss is a loss. WHY?!?!?!

Did anybody read that story in the Ojibwe News about the crackhead who does whatever to get her hands on her next fix? Who would share a story like that? I believe the problem is that bad, but to share a story like that would be… what’s the word; unheard of. Well, two-words. Overall, we should all be ashamed for what is happening to our beautiful young people. It’s not just the addicts and the suppliers, it’s everyone that has something to do with this problem. This is just a disturbing time overall. We are truly living in Hell. Shame on us all.

How would one go about dealing with this head-on? People say they know who the dealers are. What’s being done about it? It looks like nothing can be done because everybody is using and selling. Like the chairman said with our gaming staff, it could wipe out everyone we have. That is such a sad way of looking at our problems.

I STILL don’t know who I’m going to vote for. Convince me!

Day 355

Day 355 of what you ask? That's how long I've been sober. Though I've been to Vegas (... baby! VEGAS!!!) and to a graduation party a few weeks ago, not one drop of alcohol has been through my system. Yeah, I know it's hard to believe, but it's true. No more stupid mistakes, no more wondering what I did the night before and no regrets. Heavier on my frame, lighter on the conscience. So there!

I hope you'll excuse another delay in the people's posts. My house is coming along nicely, which left me homeless for a few days and the stupid nerd allergies are doing quite the number on me. Plus with coaching and playing softball, there really isn't much time left over for bloggin'... even though I'm still retired for the time being.

I'm assuming they hired for the Prevention Specialist because they were on the council meeting agenda yesterday, so I should be hearing that they didn't hire me pretty soon. As for the other job, I haven't heard a thing yet. Job Counselors make some righteous bucks, so I'm kind of hoping for that one. But we'll see I suppose.

It looks like I made my point with the drunk dialers. But if anyone else wants to keep on waking us up at a ridiculous hour, bring it on! I will still be calling out drunk dialers.

With all that I say on here, I'm starting to think that I will soon be blacklisted from everything Red Lake. Well, somebody has to say it. ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!?!?!

Any questions?

Goddamn, that was a boring post!!! I'll make up for it.

Ungah! Really Cheap!

I hope you'll excuse my boring rant on the political situation here in Red Lake. How boring was that? I apologize for any inconvenience. NO I DON'T! It's just my old age getting the best of me.

While searching the information super highway, I thought I would take another peek at MYSPACE. I have a page but it's rarely used. But while going through the different pages, it occurred to me that I really am old. I went through rlnn.com where they have links to the Red Lake musicians and visited some of them. The music was pretty good, they have a nice sound to them. But while I was reading the "adds" and stuff, I kept clicking to see who was in their network, or whatever it's called, looking through blogs and whatnot... and I have to be honest; I had no idea what most of them said or meant! Now, I'm only 30-years-old and was known to "get jiggy with it" (is that still cool to say?) and stuff back in the day, but I was lost. Everybody acts and talks like a rapper nowadays and they lose me when doing so. Don't tell me I don't understand the rap game. I grew up on the mean streets of "Hooterville." Okay, that wasn't a very good example. The whole R&B/Hip Hop didn't get around to the "Rez" until about mid to late 80s. LL Cool J, Biz Markie, Run-DMC, Kool Moe Dee, Big Daddy Kane... ah yeah, that's old school there! And then it got a little softer with MC Hammer, Vanilla Ice, C+C Music Factory and Mr. Rico Suave himself, Gerardo (don't lie, you were jammin' to those too!) Up next was slower, sexy jams like (my all-time favorite) Keith Sweat, Jodeci, R. Kelly, H-Town, Boyz II Men, Silk and whoever you can think of. After that was what we have now, "Gangsta." It was cool back in the day with N.W.A., Snoop, 2Pac and B.I.G. But somewhere along the line, it just got out of hand, with "ho's, b-words (I'm a father now, so my f-bombs are severely censored... most of the time anyway), money, guns and whatever else they rap about. Hopefully the Native Hip Hop will save the day. Good luck with that.

Wait! Where the hell did I get off track?

Political Ramblings

With that out of the way, on to more important stuff.

I just finished reading the Ojibwe News with my morning cereal and I have to say that I am shocked (shocked I tell ya) to read all of the anti-chairman letters. Well, not really. We are clearly not one with, uh... whatever we're supposed to be one with. This is going to be one of the most intense elections that I have ever seen in my 30 years, even though I've only paid attention to the last 16 years or so of politics. In... ter... esting.

You know, I'm all for free speech and stuff, but when a majority of the letters sent to Bill Lawrence are published without a name, it's kind of hard to judge how credible the source is. Standing up for what you believe in, risking all that you have for the sake of your argument is what free speech is all about. But I could be wrong. Don't get me wrong, I applaud those that have the courage to speak up. It's just that I don't see that being the way to get your message across. I especially applaud Barb Beaulieu for the letter she wrote and signed.

As for what is being said in the OjibNews, I can see both sides to this argument. I just don't take anybody else's word for it. I'm not blind, I see the signs, the supporters and other things. One way to say it, like those in the ON, is that the chairman is supporting the alleged drug dealers just because there are signs in certain peoples yards (they are alleged because I haven't heard of any raids or convictions... now the stories of the lack of laying down justice come into play here with all of the ex-employees, disgruntled or not, saying tips to those being raided kept them from prosecuting... but that's a whole 'nother story.)

Another way to see it is that the chairman is uniting the whole RL Nation; from alleged drug dealers to elders. After all, 47% is an impressive number when there are more than 2 candidates.

See? If you put enough spin or stink on your words, some people will agree with you. Thanks for the tip, Mr. Lawrence.

Then again, maybe I don't see it either of those ways because they both have flaws. Yeah, I said it! What?!

Now the way I see it, this coming from a man who is educated, both candidates have their flaws. The chairman has a cloud of controversy over his head with all that has happened in the past 15 months. But being a father myself, I know you never, AND THE ROCK (or Jon in this case) MEANS NEVER, talk about a man's family. I don't really know the chairman that well, so a personal evaluation on my part would be unfair to everyone. The challenger herself is not free of any wrong doing either. She has been our secretary for the past 12 years; 8 under B. Whitefeather, 2 under the late Butch Brun and the last 2 with our current chairman. Everyone always looks at our current debt and blames Mr. Whitefeather and former treasurer Dan King. How does her name always get overlooked? Whether or not she was in agreement with those that put us there, she was still there.

So there you have it. My words on the chairman race. I have more, you know. And I still don't know who I'm going to vote for.

Signed, LYDELL JON ROBERTS (What?!)

Update 6906

After rereading yesterday's post, it looks like I was going into the political field. Actually, I did start writing about that. I was going to break down the candidates, Hubie Brown style. But after looking at what I had wrote and realizing how much more it would take, it just didn't seem like it would be worth it. Why? Well, "Blogger" has been having some technical troubles and I didn't want the info to get lost. So that was the reason for that last sentence. I wasn't trying to scare anybody. But if you were; beware! Just kidding. I'm sure the world (Red Lake) would like an unbiased view for once. And I for one can see what the candidates have and don't have. Ho'h yah uh?!

But that will come later when my house gets done.

Under Construction

You'll have to excuse my lack of updates. My house is undergoing some construction and I had to suspend all everyday materials including internet, cooking, SLEEPING and other important stuff. So forgive me. But I hope you had a glorious 6/6/6! It looks like we all survived.

Right now I'm using my mom's access and have a lot of catching up to do. Over the past few days I've had so many thoughts about life here in Red Lake. Unfortunately, there is no method to my madness and most of those thoughts have perished in my head. But if you wait for the rotting smell of dead thoughts, maybe we'll find them together. Uh, I've said too much.

Earlier, I've said that I wasn't sure who I was going to vote for. I still don't know. No candidates have paid me a visit yet. Not even from my own district. "Well you didn't visit voters either when you ran!" you might say. And you would be correct in saying that. I didn't visit candidates because all of my info was online, being the first candidate to go the "Blog" route. In hindsight, overestimating the internet access for the Little Rock community was my downfall...that and I ONLY GOT 23 MOTHER******' VOTES!!! Curse this male ego of mine. It won't let this loss go. Now I'm upset again. I must go drown my sorrows in food. Oh, I'll be back. You candidates don't get off that easy. Every candidate in every district will be in the line of fire.

Restless... Again

Well, since I got my ears and noses as my trophies of the day by way of mother and I getting her groove (pay) back, it's time to find a new cause. I liked the fact that I put my education to use for once. The reading and research I learned in college actually helped out. Thanks BSU! If there is anybody else who has been wronged by those "above" you, let a bro know with an e-mail. We'll pick apart some rules to restore justice... like Superman! Speaking of which, it's been moved up 2 days, which means I'll have to find a job 2 days earlier. BLAST!

With another application and my first ever resume' turned in today, I'm starting to feel like the 30-year-0ld man that I am. So far I've put in for a Prevention Specialist and Job Counselor. Like I said before, I think I nailed that Prevention Specialist interview like a cheap, uh... nail. But like every other big job on the R-E-Z, the tribal council will have the final say. But why should I not get any of these jobs? I'm educated, sober (it will be one full year 6/24/06), kinda smart and willing to help. My next application and resume' with cover letter is going to be for the opening at the Homeless Shelter. We'll see though. They better hurry up and hire me because I'm out of here come tax time. Since I'm laying the smack down on this blogworld, I thought I'd try to do the same with the outside world... put all the immigrants in their place. After all, everybody but us is an immigrant.

In closing, it looks like I'm getting a lot more visitors, just getting over 1k today. Thanks for checking it out. And to you Mr. King, thanks for the kind words. The Red Lake Nation has a bright future with young minds like yours. Don't hold back on your thoughts in the blogworld.

You stay classy, Red Lake.

Victoreeeeeeeee!

That's my Johnny Drama from "Entourage" from "Viking Quest." Anybody know what I'm talking about? New "Entourage" starting Sunday!!! After that boring season of "The Sopranos" I need my faith restored in HBO.

But anyway, my shout of "Victory" had a purpose. My mom's bizz is straightened out. She got what she wanted back, so my axe is ground. Or is it grounded. You know, when someone says they have an axe to grind? Nevermind.

Again, we weren't trying to be difficult, we were just trying to get back what was unjustly taken from her. She got what she was seeking and that's that. It's over. We stood up for what we believed was right and in the end, we were successful. Good job, us.

Getting Dirrty

060506
1133 Hours

Well I’ll be! It looks like this political season is getting heated. But it’s none of my business and I don’t know the specific details so I can’t really comment. It does sound rather interesting though. If this keeps up, we’ll start to look like Leech Lake! (Oh no he di’int!) So expect us in the papers a lot in the next few months. How is this getting out of hand? It’s going to be interesting. But Ms. Beaulieu did make a good point. More people didn’t vote for the Chairman than did. Who am I going to vote for, you ask? Hmmm… interesting question. It’s a toss up. I’m not being a coward, I just don’t know yet. I’m wondering if we can have the whole election over again. Start from scratch. Anyone else feel that way along with the sore loser from the Little Rock field? Fine! But I tell ya, I would have been an awesome leader. I would’ve shared every little detail of my journey, unedited (except for the foul language of course), word for word. But that ship has sailed.

One thing I was thinking about recently in regards to the run-off, and not knowing who I am going to vote for, I was thinking about the forum in Little Rock a few weeks back. I couldn’t help but think that Darrell Seki would have been a decent candidate for Chairman. His speech was from the heart, not thought out like the rest of ours. It was just one man speaking up for his people. Though it didn’t get a standing ovation like the one that did that seemed forced (and awkward), it was the best political speech I have ever heard. Maybe in 4 years he’ll make a run at it.

That’s lunch time, baby!

The Rules

I know I've tried this before. I couldn't keep a story going for very long and blah blah blah. When I have the book part going, I'll start it out with the title of the chapter. If the chapter is broken up in a few parts (it usually happens because Blogger f's up), the title will be at the top with "continued." Or something like that. Maybe I won't even post it, who knows. Along with this, I'll be trying to write a script for my soon to be produced movie... okay, that was a lie. It's not a soon to be produced movie. I'll have a script just in case I can go that route. The main objective is to have this all done by June 30 due to "The Survivor" being too cheap to pay for Microsoft Word and using a 60-day free trial. Oh, man! Like Donkey Kong! (I'm still lame, baby!)

As for me still being awake at this ridiculous hour, it's inspiration I believe.

A Taste continued...

Why only 23 votes? I’ve asked myself that question since May 17. Sure, there were 13 candidates in my field, but still. Was it because my family is fairly small compared to the other candidates’ families? I mean one of the candidates that qualified for the run-off didn’t even show up for the forums! Politics sucks in more ways than one like a, uh….never mind.

God damn that sucks!

So what else is on the slate for me? Red Lake Gaming: Tried it and not what I want. Little Rock District Rep: Tried it and not what they want. College: Kind of finished it. I’ll take my associate’s and the show I put on at graduation and run. I have that on tape, you know. They loved me that day. I had thousands in the crowd entertained. THOUSANDS!

Besides coaching and playing ball on Wednesday nights, this is what I can do. I write. Not well, but it’s something. I was meant to entertain with my creativity, I hope. After all has been said and done, this is where life has taken me.

This is for my wife and girls.

*I think I started a book! This was the preface... I think. I wrote and kept going and going and came up with almost 1,000 words. Holy shittoh! Wish me luck.

A Taste

060406
0323 Hours

There is something in there. Trying to embrace a night’s sleep, I was caught not being able to sleep for the first time in weeks. I’m telling ya, there’s something at the tip of my brain waiting to explode and get me out of this rut. Maybe it’s inspiration. Maybe it’s my drive. Maybe it’s gas. Who knows, maybe this is the big turning point in my life. I look at all of the successful people in the world; Bill Gates, Mark Cuban, Howard Stern, Quentin Tarantino and whoever else is doing what they want with their lives and succeeding and I think to myself, “Why not me?” For the past few days it’s been like that. But what do I have that can get me there? If I look back at my academic career, the best grades I received were in my College Writing I and II, Intro to Audio, Sociology thru Film, Intro to Fiction Writing and Elementary Ojibwe I and II. Where does that leave me? Writing, I guess. Creativity is my ticket to getting out of here.

Good lord. I hope this doesn’t wear off.

Here we go!

What I love about life is how forgiving the world is. I’m guilty of being too generous by forgiving those that have wronged me, except one time. That one time is close to pushing me over the edge. What was done is unacceptable. How could it be? The most sacred of all things that heaven has blessed the world with should never experience such an incident. If anyone else were in my shoes… it’s hard to say. Well not really. Not everybody has the ability to think things through, especially around here. I think too far ahead. It keeps me out of trouble most of the time. But I’m a God fearing man, which kept me from feeding off of my emotions. That kept me from being a statistic. Face to face with that which put me in this spot… how long can I stay cool? You push a man far enough, he’s going to show some resistance.

My story begins April 28, 2006. I had a training session in Thief River Falls. Seven Clans employees were supposed to be trained by me in 3 different classes with 25 in each class throughout the day on the finer points of Title 31, or at least what I knew about it. 3 showed up for the first class. These training sessions were mandatory. To be in compliance with the governing body of Indian gaming, these were very important. The next 2 classes a total of 19 showed up. I did my training thing and I went back to the office in Red Lake around noon. I tried, man.

Back at the office, I sat at my computer stand (it didn’t deserve to be called a desk) and stared blankly at the computer screen, not at all interested in the day’s happenings on the World Wide Web. During that moment of reflection, in my mind Johnny Cash was singing “Rusty Cage” while I was typing up my resignation. After I picked it up at the printer, I decided to copy my middle finger on it. I flung it like a boomerang and walked out the door with the song still going. Is there a more perfect way to go out? I doubt it.

But reality set in and I asked my supervisor if he had a minute. I told him I’m ready to move on. He asked what I had in mind, meaning he thought I wanted out of his department. But really, as I explained to him, I was ready to get out of the gaming business. I told him that this was disheartening. I just didn’t feel anything. No accomplishment whatsoever. He told me to finish out the week and I thanked him for all he shared with me. By far one of the smartest men I have ever met.

I called my wife, she didn’t believe me. After a few seconds of disbelief, she understood. It was time for me to move on to different things. Among those things were a run at a political office. 6 weeks before, I decided to run for Little Rock District Representative. Yet again, one of my many “Why not me?” moments occurred on March 17. Really though, why not me? I’m educated, I’m young, I know “What up” with today’s world. I wanted to make clear that the next generation is ready to take responsibility for our nation.

But in the end, it wasn’t meant to be. Despite a successful forum in Minneapolis on my part, and one in the Little Rock community, the “Jonny R. Express” could only muster 23 votes. 23 motherf*****’ votes! But I was inspired by the amount of congratulations I received on my speeches.

Written by Lydell J. Roberts

060406
0029 Hours

After doing this crap for around 18 months, this is my first ever post during the midnight hour. It feels weird, like some kind of chatting perv. Why am I online this late? Ah, yes. I remember. I received a drunk dial. And the winner is………………….actually this one doesn’t count because it’s my aunt that called and I’m not too sure if she’s under the influence, so she gets a free pass. But it’s still early though. Anyone else will get their number posted and a story on this blog. Operators are standing by. As for last weekend: nothing. Nobody wanted to answer my challenge, which is too bad.

As for other business, I am still a little bothered by what’s happening with my mom. Now I’m normally one who sees management’s side of business. Since it happened to her, I am a little more sympathetic to the employee’s side. For her, I looked up the policies and procedures and found that she was wronged. She did what she was supposed to do, but to my surprise, she was left to fend for herself to the “powers that be” with the help of only ONE representative. I mean the proof was there! She was humiliated and now frustrated. If it were your mother going through this, what would you do? Exactly. The reason I didn’t go up there with her was because this was so easy to understand. But sometimes the simple turn not so simple for some reason. So I am now stunned by our leaders. But we shall get through this. If this is considered disrespectful conduct towards our leaders, then so be it. We are not trying to be disrespectful in any way, just trying to do what is right. The rules have been written and there is no reason for them to be changed for the convenience of those running the show. So there!

Anyway, all of this has further pushed me to want to get away from the Red Lake Nation. I’ve been thinking about this for years. After 9/24/04, I’ve lost the faith. It’s made me want to take my kids as far away as possible so we wouldn’t have to hurt like we have due to the actions of our own people. But I gave it so many chances. Out of fear I suppose. A whole new life somewhere else for us is pretty scary. Can we survive? Will we get lonesome? Who knows; we won’t know until we try it. And that’s what we’re going to do next year. We’re gone.

Looking at our homeland now, it’s kind of scary. Most of our people are satisfied sitting around smoking weed and drinking as much as possible. When that loses its luster, experimenting with other, more potent drugs is the next step. What next after that? What would be left to do? I don’t want to know. I’m afraid to even think about it.

But anyway, I left my name to let everyone know who wrote this. What?!

It's On Now

060206
2238 Hours

Another (no) work week has passed and the weekend is upon us once again. Honestly, it feels like I crashed that grad party a couple of days ago. Speaking of which, it was good to see my kindergarten buddy, Randy Benais, again after all these years.

Well, since it is the weekend, it’s time once again to get ready for the drunk dialers. Bring it on. The rules are the same; if you call late and wake a brotha up (or my kids… AGAIN), you will be called out. By that I mean your number will be posted on this very blog, I will call you back to see who the f*** you are and your name will be posted and I will share the story of our conversation, again, on this very blog. So I’ll be awaiting your call. Punk.

What else is happnin’ in this world wide “REZ” you ask? First of all, since I have nothing, I have nothing to lose and I am becoming a defender of those that have struggled with the “powers that be.” What was done to my mom wasn’t right. The proof was there to look at. To study, analyze, to just look over. An unjust demotion and drop in pay without documentation not only violates a worker’s rights, but also causes humiliation, stress, and loss of faith in those that are supposed to set an example and lead us. Mistreatment toward the tribal businesses most important assets, its employees, must be looked at before it’s too late. Just because we don’t sit in your circle doesn’t mean we should be treated with less respect. Curse this election season! Curse it to heck! This isn’t over. Who’s with me?!

(Breathe!)

Woo! That felt good. I’m no longer sitting on the sidelines. Though I wasn’t chosen to lead our people, I will stand up for what I believe in.

Can… you… dig it!!!

P.S. Whoever sent me the info anonymously on Bill Lawrence and wanting a contribution to the Bellecourt legal fund: What's up with that? I can think for myself AND do not contribute to legal funds that have nothing to do with yours truly. Thanks anyway!

Happy Doughnut Day!

I hope you'll excuse me. I've been over-indulging on my retirement. Sleeping all day is awesome! I would also again like to recommend the midday nap. It does wonders for... uh, stuff. Yard work, cleaning the basement and garage, playing ball and coaching has been taking up most of my time when sleeping isn't involved. But today, I'm turning in another application for this whole new fad, it's called a job... or maybe it's pronounced yob, apparently you go to a place for a period of time and do stuff and you get paid for it. I'll check it out and see what all the fuss is about.

A thought for the day:

If I were elected to the tribal council a few weeks back, I would've banned all colognes/body sprays for men. I mean, come on! They weren't invented to COVER smells. Good lord!

Too bad, Red Lake. I would have been an awesome council member. But you want to stick to your old school leaders and ignore the whole new school generation. You're going to miss us when we're off doing something else in the future and RL Nation is hurting. Just remember I offered my services. (And no, I'm not bitter at all... okay, yeah I am.)

Peace out, FOJR!!!