Happy Mond-- Eh, F*** It
As I sit here and look back at the life that I’ve led over the past 29 years, 6 months and 3 days (well, basically that’s my whole life I suppose), I wonder when success, financial-wise, will quit avoiding me like the plaque. I’m always broke, the gas prices are killing me, all I can afford to eat is junk food and I’m way behind on my summer movie watching list. So far I’ve missed “Mr. and Mrs. Smith”, “Chaz and the Choc Fac”, “Dukes of Hazzard” and, well, I guess that’s all I’ve missed. But that’s not the point! Honestly, I don’t think I have a point besides that I’m moneyless constantly. So broke I had to quit drinking! WAAAAA!!! Yeah, I’ve been without alcohol for about 52 days, but who’s counting? By far the longest of my drinking career. It should be up there with DiMaggio’s 56 game hitting streak or the Lakers 33 game winning streak. Yes, I am proud and actually have no desire to start up again. My age is catching up with me I guess. But, in the mean time, I’ll just have to keep on truckin’ with the blogs, “working” with compliance issues, coaching and TV watching.
Cheese and rice! I read my post from last Friday, and WOW! I would be scared if I was talking about me! There is something secretly disturbing about that Jon character. Wait! That’s me! Ha, ha, mother effers!
2 birthdays down, one to go, 3 sets of school clothes yet to buy and one anniversary to make up for. I mean I REALLY have to make that mutha up. It was my 5th wedding anniversary last Friday and, again, didn’t have enough to celebrate because of one of the b-days I had to pay for. But I did get a pretty good idea last night from “Hogan Knows Best.” That Hulk Hogan is the MAN! He had a stretched H2 limo, a bottle of Cristal, a night of food, wine, and massages! Plus he had his old wrestling buddy Knobbs babysit (which by the way, I think Knobbs is going to be the next Don Vito… he might need his own show). Somehow I’m gonna have to come through with something close to that, man. But the best I can do is wash the Malibu, find a bottle of Red Slice (do they even make that anymore?), take Mrs. The Jon to Applebee’s, and find George Jefferson to step on our backs. Or something likes that.
Until next time, fellow losers of society… I’m out!
Cheese and rice! I read my post from last Friday, and WOW! I would be scared if I was talking about me! There is something secretly disturbing about that Jon character. Wait! That’s me! Ha, ha, mother effers!
2 birthdays down, one to go, 3 sets of school clothes yet to buy and one anniversary to make up for. I mean I REALLY have to make that mutha up. It was my 5th wedding anniversary last Friday and, again, didn’t have enough to celebrate because of one of the b-days I had to pay for. But I did get a pretty good idea last night from “Hogan Knows Best.” That Hulk Hogan is the MAN! He had a stretched H2 limo, a bottle of Cristal, a night of food, wine, and massages! Plus he had his old wrestling buddy Knobbs babysit (which by the way, I think Knobbs is going to be the next Don Vito… he might need his own show). Somehow I’m gonna have to come through with something close to that, man. But the best I can do is wash the Malibu, find a bottle of Red Slice (do they even make that anymore?), take Mrs. The Jon to Applebee’s, and find George Jefferson to step on our backs. Or something likes that.
Until next time, fellow losers of society… I’m out!
posted by Jonny R. at 4:27 PM
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