I Stand Alone

This life of sobriety is a tough one. Everywhere I look, there are reminders of what my life used to be like. Getting calls at all hours of the night to go and party, trying to keep my mind off of alcohol is going to be difficult. I thought I would be supported by some in my mission to stay alcohol free, but, it looks like I'm on my own. Woo! This is going to be tougher than I thought. So it looks like I'll need to continue on as a blogger to keep a clear head. But anyway, other things are far worse in the world than my little problem. The tsunami in Asia is one thing that I can't get out of my head. An unpredictable natural disaster that killed over 150,000 still has me stunned. The world around us is falling apart. That's pretty scary. Bush should pull all of the troops out of Iraq and send them to help with the relief effort. That would make him the most popular president of all time. Yeah, pass that idea on! I am sooo smart. I should run for some sort of office. I have 3 years of college experience that I haven't used yet. Maybe I should graduate college first, aye? Whatever, man. First on my agenda would be to get the "Rez" on track somehow. There are so many problems, I wouldn't know where to begin. Senseless crimes and lack of respect have plagued us for so many years. How could we put an end to it all? We can't blame alcohol because this is an alcohol free "Rez", right? Yeah, right. Where did all of this start? When did this all start? Who knows... but there has to be a better way, right? Anyone? I know my trying to quit drinking is a laughing matter to all of those that know me. But I've had so many days when I was hanging over, my head throbbing, no taste in my mouth wondering how I got home or what did I do to humiliate myself yet again. I've done that a lot the past few years. I've tried to quit before and have failed over and over again. Can I stay sober? Probably not. I could blame those around me, but that's just an excuse to keep drinking. But what is there to do around here? Gamble, drink... not many options if you don't have any money. AND I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY! This is going to be real hard for me. I just hope I don't fail as often as I did the other times I tried to quit. I suppose I could get caught up on some reading for my classes next week. That's all I got. Alright, man. I'm outta here. Later, cats and kittens. (Excuse the lameness.)